The Truth About Night Nursing and Sleep Training: Why Responsive Parenting Matters

Apr 3

In a culture that often prioritizes convenience over connection, it's easy to see why so many parents are led to believe that night waking and frequent nursing are "problems" to be solved. But the truth is, responsive parenting and night nursing are not only normal but biologically necessary for a baby's optimal development.

Night Nursing: More Than Just Midnight Snuggles

Breastfeeding throughout the night isn't just about comfort—it plays a crucial role in maintaining a full milk supply. Prolactin, the hormone responsible for milk production, is at its highest levels during nighttime nursing sessions. This means that those sleepy feedings aren't just meeting your baby's immediate needs; they're also ensuring a healthy and sustained milk supply for the long run.

The Harm of "Sleep Training" Through Ignoring

There's a common misconception that ignoring a crying baby will teach them to "self-soothe" and sleep better. However, research shows that this practice doesn't train a baby to regulate their emotions or sleep more soundly—it teaches them that their cries for help will go unanswered. Over time, they may stop calling out, not because their needs have disappeared, but because they've learned that no one will respond.

Babies cry because they need something—whether it's food, comfort, or regulation. Ignoring these needs doesn't foster independence; it fosters insecurity.

Real Support, Not Quick Fixes

Rather than pushing parents toward unrealistic expectations of infant sleep, we need to offer real, evidence-based support. Here are a few ways to make responsive parenting more sustainable:

Co-sleeping (when done safely): This can make night feedings easier and improve sleep for both parents and babies.
Babywearing: Keeping baby close during the day can promote bonding and ease transitions between sleep cycles.
Gentle sleep training (past a certain age): Some methods focus on gradually helping babies adjust to sleep without resorting to harmful "cry-it-out" tactics.
Partner and community support: Raising a baby takes a village. Encouraging partners to take an active role, and creating networks of support, makes responsive parenting more manageable.

Honoring the Biological Norm

Parenting isn't about finding ways to make babies more convenient—it's about meeting their needs in ways that foster connection, trust, and long-term well-being.

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